I love him.

I love him so much it hurts. It hurts when I have to leave knowing it'll be 3 weeks before I see him again. I can't wait until the day I can see him whenever I want and not these scheduled visits. I miss him already and I've only been back for 2hrs. I hate knowing he's so far away even though he's closer then before. I hate knowing that if I saw him more often that he'd open up to me more. I hate knowing he's holding back because he's afraid of getting hurt. Because I know that he's the one.

Once again..

I'm complaining.. So I forgot my bag in my friends trunk last night. So I texted him at 11am.. to find out when I can meet him to get my bag. He calls me at 2:30pm to tell me he'll be at said location at 3pm. Ok so it's a Sunday and I'm unemployed but that doesn't mean I sit at home all day waiting around for people to get back to me. I was making plans to run errands and now they're screwed. So I called my other friend back saying I couldn't make it (the one I was supposed to meet up with). So I mentioned if she wants to go said place with me later let me know. Sooner rather then later. She's like " ok miss schedule"..
I'm sorry but seriously does NOBODY know me? I like to have a game plan I don't like running around like a chicken with my head cut off. Never have. So don't act like its something new.

I need to complain..

About my best friend.. seriously I'm irked right now. We've been planning to go to this event for over a month now. And she waits til the day of.. which is today to try and buy tickets at 7pm. Well guess what tickets sales ended at 6. So now we have to pay full price to get in and we are both broke. So she starts pulling this "i'm not goin" shit.. Me .. not happy..
my rant... don't fuckin pull this I'm not going shit with me.. I've been waiting to go to this for 3 fucking months and because your lazy ass didn't get on the ball last week like you kept saying you were going to your now saying you won't go. My bf was supposed to be here this weekend but is lacking money also so he isn't here.. if my friend really wasn't going to go I would've left to fuckin see my boyfriend. The only reason I stayed was because we were going to the event. I know shes kidding but seriously this is her fuckin fault and I'm really frustrated at her lack of being able to take control of her life. She is 28yrs old.. no job. . lives with grandma and her car is broken down.. she has a good heart but her lack of motivation kills me.


That is all.

random stuff..

I think my mom is paranoid.. She wants to shred everything with her name and address on it. Seems like a complete waste to me since you can look everyone up on the internet and get their name and phone number for just 10bucks.. So if someone REALLY wanted to find you they could..
I have another interview tomorrow this will be the third I believe. Its to be an admin assist for and insurance company. I also am set up with a temp agency for the time being yet have not been given any jobs. I'm really hoping to get a state job. It's my goal. If I get a state job I can make good money and retire in about 20years. That way I don't have to go to grad school. I know I had all these plans beforehand but if I can make good money and move up quickly in the state then I might as well. Then I can work part time when I'm retired and give back to the community like I had intended to by working for the salvation army or something like that.